Deserving
by Mermays
Summary: Gray deals with the guilt of how he's treated Juvia over the years and feels he doesn't deserve her love and devotion. Gruvia One-shot request. Angst and wholesomeness.


**Deserving**

Gray sat silently, thinking about the one person who's been on his mind a lot lately. Juvia had formally confessed to him a few days ago and he couldn't handle it and had been avoiding her ever since. What did he do to deserve such confessions of love? All he's ever done is ignore her feelings and be harsh towards her, yet she still loved him and showed it in every way her loving little heart could think of. He felt shitty and couldn't bear to look at her after the way he had reacted to her confession. As soon as Natsu had entered the area he immediately started a fight with the dragonslayer, all but forgetting the blushing stunned bluenette he was with before. He had seen the hurt flash across her features, and it made his heart clench. Why did he always act that way towards her…? Why… did he always hurt her…?

He clutched his raven hair in his fists with frustration and shame when he caught a glimpse of Juvia's face. She was sitting a few tables away, her lips in a frown and her eyes downcast as she fiddled with the straw in her glass. He immediately looked away, clenching a fist as his eyes passed the window where he could see the rain that had been occurring the past few days; the rain that he had once put a stop to. Now he was the cause.

"Gray."

He looked up to see Lucy standing in front of him with her hands on her hips and a frown on her face. She scrutinized his face for a second before continuing.

"I don't know what happened between you and Juvia, but you need to talk to her and make things right."

"How did you-" he begins to question but she cuts him off.

"It's been raining for the past three days, Gray. Juvia hasn't made it rain since she joined us, and you're the reason it stopped. I think we all know the only reason that it would start again. Rain is nice and all, but not when it's because our friend is hurt. We want to see her smile again…"

His frown deepened as he took in her words and stared down at his boots. Of course everyone would know it was his fault, everyone knew how the water-mage felt about him.

"And fix it soon ice bastard, or I won't hold back in crushing you. That woman's helped me with a lot, though I never asked her to, so I won't hesitate to hurt you if you leave her hurt like this."

He flinched at the bite in the iron dragonslayer's words and glanced up at the glare Gajeel was giving him.

"A-alright… I'll talk to her…"

"Good" both Lucy and Gajeel replied to him in unison before turning in their respective directions. Who would've thought one day both Lucy and Gajeel would corner him and for the same reasons?

The ice mage sighed and hung his head. Sure, he said he'd talk to Juvia and fix things, but what was he going to say? 'I'm sorry I deliberately dodged your formal confession to me, can we still be friends?' That wouldn't help things at all. And he couldn't date her after the way he's treated her over the time since she joined. She deserved better than that. She deserved better than him…

He stood, shoving his hands in his pockets, and walked out the door of the guild hall to be greeted by the rain; Juvia's rain. He strode through the rain that played as a reminder of how much he hurt her, and just kept walking through, not bothering to make an umbrella.

"Dammit...!" He clenched his fists and kicked the ground. "Why me…?!"

"G-Gray-sama…"

His head jerked up at the sound of the bluenette's voice, and he saw her standing a few feet away with a nervous and sad expression in her blue eyes. Her azure waves were blowing slightly with the breeze, but a little damp from the rain despite the pink umbrella she held over her head.

"Gray-sama left without an umbrella today, s-so… Juvia was going to let you use her's so you don't catch a cold…" She fidgeted in her place, hiding her face from view as she slowly held out her umbrella in front of her.

He stared at her outstretched hand and the pink umbrella gripped in it for a few seconds before gritting his teeth and turning his gaze to the ground, his fists clenched.

"Why me…?" He looked up at her surprised face. "Why does it have to be me…? I've done nothing but ignore your feelings and act coldly towards you. Most would have given up by now and found somebody else… What have I done to deserve such love and devotion from you? I've been rude, I've ignored you, I've even made you cry… How could you still like me after all that?!"

"Gray-sama…" she stepped a little closer to him, her eyes wide and sad, on the verge of tears as she saw tears build up in his eyes and roll down his cheeks.

"I-I don't deserve you, Juvia… You've always been so kind, caring and l-loving to me… You've always supported me and was on my side, you gave me your company and affections…" he paused, as more tears streamed down his face and he ran his fingers through his hair. "B-but I never gave you anything… You'd show your feelings and I'd give you harsh words and would avoid you, not caring how you felt… I even dodged your formal confession to me, hurting you in the process for these last few days…" he fell to his knees, clutching at his now soaked hair. "E-even if I care for you now… I-I don't deserve to be with you… I don't deserve… your love…"

Tears streaked down her flushed cheeks as she moved closer and lowered herself in front of him, the umbrella lay forgotten on the wet stone ground. She hesitated in reaching her hand out to him before just clasping both her pale hands in her lap tightly.

"Juvia loves you… Gray-sama…"

He tries to rebuttal, but she interrupts him and continues, her eyes fixed on his.

"Gray-sama was the first person to show true kindness to Juvia when he saved her from falling after our first fight, and again when he offered her a place in Fairy Tail. With that kindness… Gray-sama cleared Juvia's skies that had been filled with rain and loneliness for as long as she could remember… he brought her to a guild where everyone accepted Juvia for who she was…" she sniffled and wiped some tears from her cheek. "Yes there were times when you were cold, but there were even more times when you were kind… Juvia knows your kindness… Juvia loves your devotion to your guild and your friends; how much you care for them and protect them... even Juvia. Juvia loves how much Gray-sama knows he can rely on Juvia in battle to be compatible and to have your back. It makes me happy…" sniffles, "that I… am someone you can rely on and trust…"

"Juvia…"

"Juvia has never felt more happiness… than she has since she met you, G-Gray-sama… And Juvia couldn't imagine… being with anyone else. You have done more for me than you know." She leans towards him and wraps her slender arms around him, hugging him close to her, "So… don't leave Juvia's side saying you don't deserve her… You have done so much that has made Juvia love you more and more… Gray-sama…"

He slowly looked at her through the corners of his eyes and sees the thin tears streak her cheeks and her lip trembling slightly. His eyes shifted back down to his hands that he had gently clasped behind her back in their embrace. He closed his eyes as a few more tears fell, and he could feel her evening out breathing and her warmth. He had never felt so much warmth from one person before and he just let it fill him and melt his icy heart. He let her defrost him. He felt lighter and more relaxed.

After a few more minutes in their embrace he takes a breath and uses one hand to wipe the tears from his face before breaking the silence that surrounded them.

"Juvia… I… I don't know that I can start dating you now… I do care about you and over time, despite how I remained to be towards you, I have grown to have feelings for you… but…" He paused and leaned back, his hands on her shoulders, and looked into her blue orbs, "with how I've acted towards you, I do no think I can date you yet… But I will stay by your side no matter what. I want to become a man worthy of you, a man worthy of being by your side as more than just a team partner. I will treat you better, like you have done me. I want to protect you and cherish you like you deserve… I accept your feelings for me, Juvia… So… If you'll wait for me, not now, but one day when I've become a better man for you… then I will give you my answer. I promise."

A teary smiled formed on her flushed face as she pulled him into another warm embrace and a small smile spread on his lips. He gently rubbed her hair with his hand while the other wrapped around her.

"Juvia will wait for as long as you need, Gray-sama… Juvia will be at your side waiting. Juvia… will never leave you… So, I look forward to when Gray-sama can give Juvia his answer, and I look forward to… the time by your side until then and the time by your side afterwards. I love you, Gray-sama…" she whispered the last part in a breath.

He smiled once more and in a soft tone he responded, "Thank You, Juvia…" and they remained in each other's company for the rest of the evening in comfortable conversation.

~_El Fin~_

**AN: A Gruvia one-shot with angst and a wholesome sweet ending was requested by Mr. Obsidian Slasher :) My apologies that this took longer than I had planned x.x I had planned to have this done sooner but ended up having a bunch of stuff making me busy, but I wanted to write this soo, it is written. I hope this one-shot is okay! I'm sorry if it is a little short, I've never written something angsty before heh heh Anyway, I hope you like it! Please let me know what you think! ^^ And thank you much for the request! :D**


End file.
